Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Thought of the day

I have been feeling a bit under the weather lately. Not emotionally, but physically.
I've been diagnosed with benign positional vertigo. Something that I've ignored most of the time.
This would explain why I couldn't turn my head sideways whenever I walk.
It was a good thing that I got to ask a doctor of related profession what I've been going through for quite some time.

So comes in costly medicines that I have to take on a daily basis. But the odd thing about it is that it somehow makes me more nauseous.
Please cross out the idea of me being a mom, that's totally out of the question here.

Our company physician has recommended that I take 4 days off from work, add to that my scheduled 2 days off.
So that would mean I'd be stuck at home for 6 days. I must admit that this will take the load off my back, having to work 5-6 days a week talking to people with most of them having comprehension disabilities.
But the fact that I'd be disappointing my team captain about my condition, about not helping our team stats at all.
I am quite aware of my performance and I want to make it to the point of maintaining an excellent performance-based grade.
But how can I be effective if I can't hear that well? If I feel nauseous everytime.
I have set a goal that seems to be within reach now, but with my health condition, it might be a big obstacle I would have to either endure or sink in to.

It's just that, instead of having to worry about nothing else for a week. I'd be stuck staring at the ceiling or at a corner thinking about how disappointing my stat is. And of how I feel I've disappointed my team captain.
Makes me feel guilty of being sick.

It just doesn't feel right.

Oh what to do.


MeL said...

Don't lose hope. You need to take a break so grab the chance they gave you.

May na-discover din akong sakit ko last year. I thought di na sya mawawala but based dun sa lab results ko last Oct, lumiit na sya. This april, I'm going to have it checked again.. sa OB ko. :D

es said...

sometimes getting sick brings us back into the idea that we are also human capable of making a life that is not confined only on thinking about workloads and earnings. It's reminding us also not to neglect the very wealth that we have which is our health.

hope you feel better soon. there's nothing to be guilty of, we're mortals after all.

krishA said...

cheer up charlie.
and always have hope.
remember a lot of people love you :)